This seems to be such a scary taboo, concept for so many people. What are they interpreting it to bring- pain, retaliation, anger, loss of love, accusation and rejection? Perhaps these were familiar patterns in the home of origin. Maybe family edicts growing up, taught; these would be the consequences and would be a sure fire way to always upset the apple cart.
I say “let’s shake it up”. If we don’t allow ourselves the freedom of our true voice and thoughts we suppress our lives away into toxic, internalized illness, and a true feeling of disconnect and alienation. Many homes have taught avoidance, numbing and denial at all costs. These may have been alcoholic families, violent households, or just very repressed, or even part of cultural norms. Not trying to impose values on anyone, but rather encourage open communication as a vital part of health and a freeing of the spirit to gain clarity. Whether the other is able to take in your inquiry negatively, or with warmth and receptivity is only one part of the equation. Just release it without expectation. If you speak your truth in a kind and dignified manner (maybe you need to write it down first, and think it through), you will not suffer with the lie, nor the lack of understanding of the situation. So why not replace the word “confrontation” with “Clarification”. Clarity prevents craziness on so many levels and lets you sleep at night, knowing you have said your peace. Perhaps you may even receive gems of warmth and understanding in the response you may engender.
Best of luck launching your courage to not stay stuck in the gagging smoke of fear.
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